Elder Neal A. Maxwell’s reminder that exclusion for righteousness is not rejection — it’s refinement.

Intro
There are seasons in life when conviction tests companionship — when holding true to gospel standards draws distance instead of approval. Elder Neal A. Maxwell’s Guideline #13 from Guidelines for Righteous Living begins with this counsel:
“Do not be discouraged if fair-weather friends discard you because you keep the standards of the Church.”
It’s a tender reminder that exclusion can be sanctifying. When others drift away for choosing righteousness, the Lord draws closer.
Notes from Elder Neal A. Maxwell
- “Do not be discouraged as some fair-weather friends discard you because you keep the standards of the Church.”
- “Sometimes it is better to be left out than to be taken in.”
- “While the exclusion will hurt, the bruises will disappear and the blessings will remain.”
- “Don’t ever envy those who live unrighteously. They only appear to be happy. They only seem to be free.”
- “It is better for you to be alienated from the gang than to be alienated from God.”
- “Not because you’re too good for them, but because you’re not that strong.”
- “Do not let others mess up your mind with the muddy feet of the world.”
Perspective
Elder Maxwell laid out a pattern for discipleship in difficult times:
| Key Principle | Elder Maxwell’s Counsel & Explanation | Timeless Lesson |
|---|---|---|
| Do Not Be Discouraged | “Do not be discouraged as some fair-weather friends discard you.” | True discipleship may mean walking alone for a season. |
| Choose Exclusion Over Corruption | “Sometimes it is better to be left out than to be taken in.” | Purity is worth more than popularity. |
| Focus on Lasting Blessings | “The bruises will disappear and the blessings will remain.” | Wounds heal; eternal rewards stay. |
| Do Not Envy the Unrighteous | “They only appear to be happy.” | The world’s joy is a mirage. |
| Alienation from God vs. the Gang | “Better to be alienated from the gang than from God.” | Choose divine connection over social comfort. |
| Avoid Immoral Company | “Not because you’re too good…but because you’re not that strong.” | Humility is the truest safeguard. |
| Guard Your Mind | “Don’t let people with muddy feet track dirt into your thoughts.” | Protect your mind — it’s sacred ground. |
Practice (today, not someday)
When rejection comes for doing what’s right, I can choose gratitude over resentment. Every lost friendship rooted in worldliness is space made for godly strength to grow.
Today, I’ll guard my mind from bitterness and remember: exclusion for righteousness is not punishment — it’s preparation.
Final Reflection
To live by conviction in a permissive world is to stand in a quiet kind of courage. Elder Maxwell’s words remind me that it’s better to face a smaller circle with a clear conscience than a full crowd with a clouded one.
Fair-weather friends may drift, but the faithful stay anchored. In the end, only one friendship lasts forever — the one I keep with God.
Pocket I’m Keeping
When others walk away, I’ll walk with Christ. The bruises fade, but His presence remains.
What I Hear Now
“Do not be discouraged if fair-weather friends discard you because you keep the standards of the Church.”
— Elder Neal A. Maxwell
Photo Caption (BTS)
Behind the Shot: Salt Lake Temple at night — still and bright against the dark. I waited for the wind to stop before taking a 5-second exposure so every red bloom stayed still. The temple lights shone through the silence — a symbol of standing firm when others fade away.
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